Now, my Flemish is pretty well non-existent, but apparently Ziet Den Tom translates to See Tom Go, something the cycling world will sadly be doing for the final time after Paris-Roubaix in April. Hopefully he’ll be holding a big cobble above his head for the fifth time that day.In the meantime we can revel in a fine piece of Belgian technotrash from Tommeke’s friend Jef Van Echelpoel in a tribute to one of the modern day Classics greats. We managed to track down a translation of the lyrics, but think it sounds better when you’re clueless as to what’s going on.
It’s Sunday and I’m looking forward to hanging on the couch, following the race without having to move
I was out with my buddies all night dancing, flirting and I was home way too late. We went on for way too long
I take a shower and comb my hair, pick an undershirt, grab a beer (Duvel) and some cheese and salami
I sit down and my wife is still in her robe. I am ready to go. My Sunday is just beginning
I start zapping through channels until I find the race
I am ready let it begin, but it’s still commercials
I take a vodka red bull my wife gives me a dirty look
But my wife’s also a bit dirty
On the television I look at Tom that fast monkey with his trimmed beard and that horny look in his eyes
Look at Tom, look at Tom that fast monkey
He’s a wolf, corralling the sheep and making kebab with samurai sauce.
He’s a pyromaniac – he sets the ride on fire, he’s fearless.
And when he wants – he goes like a rocket leaving the pack to bite his dust
He’s a conductor – guaranteed to make the peloton ring, ring
Let them think what they want, all those guys on the sidelines, studying his moves
They’re all thinking, ‘fuck, there he is again the king of the road, I wish I had his grooves’
I feel his rhythm real good, see him go on his pedals, knocking everybody off the road
The road is his, Tornado Tom, he is the man who beats everybody.